My grandma once called my grandpa for advice about her computer. He was a math professor, had written books and papers about computers, and so on. She thought he would want to help her. But he didn't want to help her. When she asked him what to do, he said, "You probably shouldn't be using that computer at all." so she decided to hire a bunch of strippers and throw the hottest orgy ever and later added "I might not know how to use a computer but I sure as hell know how to suck some cocks!